The Real Y&R Mystery

The Young and the Restless used to be the template for all soaps to follow. What happened to change this once great show? Viewers don't just quit watching out of the blue. There has to be a causal event that triggers a chain reaction to produce such an outcome.

There's no mystery on this one. The one common complaint of viewers is the writing and direction of the show. If the writing leaves a majority of the viewers disconnected, they will leave. When they leave, the ratings go down, which in turn leads the network to believe that people don't care about soaps anymore. Viewers aren't watching for a reason: they don't care about are poorly written stories.

Sony can fix the problem of a declining viewership by fixing the writing problem. Sony needs to ring a Bell, and do it ASAP. Stop the stunt casting and stop the madness- PLEASE! Who cares about the overdone mystery of Diane's death. I want this one solved: The mystery of the disappearing characters and dropped storylines. Forget the laughable investigation of Colin, and investigate how Bell can keep her job when this show is imploding!

The stunt casting is especially problematic. I don't buy the line about a “bloated cast” because Bell has been on a hiring spree of baffling proportions. Bell is the Oprah of stunt casting, walking through Hollywood shouting at anyone who comes near, “And you get a role, and YOU get a role, AND YOU GET A ROLE. EVERYBODY GETS A ROLE!” If budget is a concern, and if screen time for current players is a concern, then logic says, DON'T HIRE ANYONE ELSE!

Good business sense and logic have flown out of the Y&R offices on a pink unicorn, floating on a cloud of cotton candy, escorted by the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. Maybe we need to get Logic to Occupy Bell's Office. We want to get back great stories like Colin and Jill. We want a show that makes us oooo and ahhhh instead of urp and arrgh! The biggest mystery of all is why Sony hasn't voted Bell off the island yet.

Investigative Report: The Secrets of Y&R Magic Revealed

Where does Head Writer Maria Arena Bell get her ideas for plots and for the new characters for what she called an already "bloated cast." How does the magic at Y&R happen?

Maria Bell watched Oprah, saw Genie Francis and got the big idea to hire her as a new character on Y&R. Fans were told that something exciting was going to happen with the Atkinson/Ashby clan. Hopes were high that they would give the Newmans and Abbotts a refreshing new rival. So we connect Oprah to Genevieve's arrival in Genoa City.

Then, according to her latest interview, Maria went to a performance of Hairspray, saw Diana DeGarmo, and voila, Y&R got another new character... for an already “bloated cast.”

Ahhh, so our collective lightbulbs turn on and we begin to understand the workings of the Bell brain. She goes out on the town and POOF ideas just come running. We recently had an investigative reporter shadow Bell's evening activities so we could get figure out what new characters are on the Y&R horizon.

Bell attended a Comic-Con event and came up with a side kick for Super Cane. She met up-and-coming Luke Skywalker imitator Frank Nardo who will be joining Y&R as an Aussie Platypus wrangler named Bruce. Bruce spends all his time saying things like, “Wow Cane you ARE a hero” only pausing in the constant the hero worship to iron Cane's cape.

Attempting to replace the Aussie accent of Tristan Rogers, Bell was inspired by a Geico commercial and hired the Cockney Mr. Gecko. Mr. Gecko announced that he has now saved Y&R 15% by hiring him, and she confided to him that no one will notice the change in accent.  "They're all the same... right?” she stated confidently.

Bell then announced that Judge Joe Brown had been added to the cast after watching him bang a gavel and roll his eyes. She hired the judge to act and to help her research the intricacies of what happens during a trial. “Research is so important” she said. “The trial thing of Diane's murderer is going to be fantastic. It will last about a year because there's laws and stuff like that. The interpols send a new detective, played by THE Inspector Gadget- I watch his show faithfully” she confided. “They use the google from the internets to do really investigative things” she quipped. “I hope I'm not to technical for you” she explained.

After she stopped at Jack-in-the-Box for a quick bite to eat, she signed Jack-in-the-box spokesman, Jack, on the spot to do a 12 week stint as Jack Abbott's twin brother Jack. She told a puzzled bystander, “He'll have a major storyline in which he accidentally chokes the other Jack with a Jumbo Jack or a Sourdough Jack, with cheese, lots of swiss cheese, the kind with great big holes in it. Maybe some fries. I like fries, so I'll use lots of that, and maybe Swiss cheese fries too... What was the question?”

At this point our investigator in the shadows reported that Bell started playing with the Jack-in-the-Box head that she purchased with the meal. She tossed it up a few times, then... yes, she dropped the ball- which then rolled out of her window, onto the street, only to be crushed by a big yellow bus.

So, cheers to Maria Arena Bell. Where does she get these great ideas and how will she use her next set of great ideas? Only time will tell... if we HAVE time that is.

The Redemption of Cane

Remember seeing those movies that do a rewrite at the end so you can have options to choose from on your DVD?  It's your own Burger King edition of a film- you get to have it your own way.  That may work for movies, but not for daytime drama.  I'm convinced that Maria Bell and her team of writers are confused as to the necessity of constantly rewriting The Young and the Restless. They give us one ending, then switch and give us a different one.  First Cane was Philip, then he was blood kin to Katherine, then not, then he was, then he was Cane, then he was Caleb, then he was Cane.  He was a liar, then he was a hero... no a liar... no a hero, no wait, he gaslighted Lily, no wait, he was really a good guy, or not....? 

In a story that is character driven, the character assassinations don't rule the day according to the whims of the writer or the financial concerns of the producers.  Y&R's claims to be character driven are a slap in the face to the fans who clearly know the difference.  Bell has an agenda.  First it was to destroy and get rid of Cane.  And then she was forced to bring Daniel Goddard back.  I was glad to see him back because he was giving us some of his best acting in scenes with Tristan Rogers.  There was a whole new story to tell there of Cane's lingering secrets and his newly revealed family.  Whew! Finally something we can sink out teeth into again.  Finally there was something to get us through the lame re-dos of the other plots MAB was making us sleep though.

But here's the kicker, Bell, a "professional" writer who's modus operandi is to leave stories dangling till they disappear, couldn't figure out a single way to redeem both Cane and Colin.  Neither could Hamner. This is mind boggling that they couldn't summon up a single creative brain wave to give a reasonable explanation that would let us enjoy the Atkinson/Ashby family for years to come.  As a writer, I would be too embarrassed to announce that publicly, but yet they proudly proclaim, "Hey people, we have no imagination and can't write our way out of a paper bag.  Thanks and keep watching." 

Seriously?  Bell kills Cane so dead, so very very dead and puts her brand of an exclamation mark in that whole death scene and follow up.  Yes, we got it, Maria.  The guy is dead.  But wait.  It is a miracle.  That was Caleb.  Really?  A twin?  How inventive.  Not... But then she wastes Cane's reinsertion into Genoa City with more non sequiturial writing.  It is an insult to fans that we are supposed to believe the trite set up and rewrite, lame clues, and the limp twists.  With the lame material Ronan and Chance have in this "investigation" I don't know how they can do theses scenes without laughing.  It is all one stinking mess, and Sony knows it.

Sony could fix this by calling for Tristan's return, which means that they'd need a writer with a sense of logic and imagination, who could write a return, and explain it without going the twin route.  Let us have Colin back and find out that he was framed or some other plausible story.  Sony needs have their own redemptive act to save Y&R.  They need to invite Bell and her undynamic duo to take a break from the daily phoning in of their scripts, and then bring in someone who will simply write a great story that will bring fans back.  Come on Sony, get on the ball.

Losing Tristan Rogers is a lose lose situation

Having just read a twit about the validity of Tristan Rogers leaving Y&R, I must first say that the opiner recognizes Tristan's great talent.  I'll nod and agree with that.  But to say that Tristan's character Colin had no real reason to be on Y&R is quite short sighted.  If memory serves, it seems like Robert Scorpio was simply to show up and make Luke's life a little harder on General Hospital, and then leave.  Just a bit part.  Nothing more.  No real reason for Robert Scorpio to be in Port Charles.

However, Glory Monty was a visionary who could take a single moment or a peek at a character, and turn it into something that exploded onto our screens.  She took a dying soap and created a cultural change.  She took a bit part and created a timeless character and authorized Tristan to bring Robert to life.  Tristan's talent was what marveled the fans, but he had to have producers and writers who prepared the canvas for his performance.

That was then.  This is now.  No we can't live in the past, and entertainment must change with the times. However, the basics of the art of telling a captivating story do not really change.  Soap fans demand good storytelling, then and now.  That means we need soap producers and writers that have a vision and a love of the genre.  We demand great acting.  Bill Bell created something marvelous, enough so that it has had top ratings throughout its tenure.  But along comes Maria Arena Bell, who seems to have no love for soaps, no vision, and no discernment between character and plot driven writing.  The episodic evidence shows a lack of understanding of good storytelling that begins, stretches, builds and ends a story, only pausing to connect it to the next story.

When fans are bombarded with the hype for the next big thing on a soap, we'll test the waters and if it's good, we'll jump in with both feet.  That is what happened on GH with Robert Scorpio, and that is also what happened on Y&R with Colin.  Actually, Colin had more reason to be in GC: family.  There were all the questions about Cane when he was in Australia.  There was already a mystery, and what it seemed like at the beginning, was that we were going to get more of the story.  It was interesting, mysterious, intriguing.  Fans became hooked on Colin and Jill.  You can't give fans a reason to watch faithfully and then back peddle, saying that we must lose the stuff we're tuning in to see and replace it with a slew of others that have nothing to do with any current story or family.

What had so much promise was purposefully turned into a train wreck by Bell.  Colin and Jill became a huge draw, a diversion from the mundane rewrites of rewritten rewrites as well as the multitude of dropped storylines.  Colin and Jill made us laugh and cry amid stories that left us apathetic and questioning why we even watch Y&R anymore.

Y&R used to have core families, but now we are left with a handful of Bell's favorites who get screen time.  Those who displease the Queen of Mean get nice long vacations.  She has run over core relationships one too many times and now there is no trust in what she writes.  IF she were to tell great stories and execute it well... IF that were the case, then fans wouldn't be bitching.  Actors and pundits are bitching.  Y&R is unfortunately on its way out, left to the devises of the current leadership.  Ratings are down and just because we say the Emperor has beautiful clothes on, doesn't make him any less naked.

Sony can pull a Frons, or they can fix this.  Our loss in turn will be their loss.

A Bloated Cast... or Writer's Room?

Guess what?  Y&R has hired more actors.  (Not hearing any applause here.)  I thought the execs had declared that their cast was "too bloated" and therefore needed to be weeded out.  That's what they said anyway.  It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that those execs look down from their ivory towers and only see their own reflection in the office window.  The fans are completely invisible and exist only to add to the ratings and thusly fill the network and corporation pockets.

At one time, wasn't the viewer/network relationship supposed to be a symbiotic relationship where each entity brought something to the table and received something valuable in return?  The network's job was to put on an entertaining show that brought viewers in to watch.  The hoped for response was two fold: 1) enjoy the show enough to return every day and 2) watch the commercials and buy the products of the sponsors.  This in turn put money in the sponsor's pockets, who then continued to sponsor the show and pay the networks for the privilege.

But somehow this symbiotic relationship became more of an Emperor/serf dynamic.  The Emperor puts on a show and tells the serfs that they will enjoy it, no matter how crappy it is.  (Reminds me of Monty Python's Holy Grail line about how you know he is the king... "He hasn't got s**t all over him).  I digress, but the premise is applicable.  We, the serfs, should be receiving something pleasing.  We tune in to see these characters that we invite into our homes every day- characters we care about.  And though no writer has ever pleased all of the fans all of the time, these are dark days for the fans, across the board.

Take for example Y&R's statement about having a bloated cast.  Tristan Rogers entered Genoa City as Colin, a part of Cane's family and then swept Jill off her feet.  There was a clear purpose for his presence there that was promised to solve some mystery and create others.  Both new and long time fans found Jill's renewed presence on screen to be playful and strong.  Watching Jill and Colin left fans smiling and wanting more.  Fans still want more and urge for his return.

But in the mind of Maria Arena Bell, there was no other way to redeem Cane than to throw Colin under the bus.  If the cast is so bloated, why has Y&R hired even more actors (Melissa Claire Egan, Debbi Morgan, Eddie Mekka, Diana DeGarmo, Peter Porte to name a few)?  These are characters that we could easily do without.  Debbi Morgan is a fine actress, but why add to the GC scene when it robs the fans of current characters and stories?  Why buy into her character of Yolanda (or rather Bell's rewrite of "Harmony") or that story when we know that it will be dropped when the next new thing peeks around the corner?

I submit that it is the executive branch of Y&R that is bloated.  The writers room is overstaffed by at least three, and the Executive Producer's chair needs to be filled by someone who loves soaps, loves the fans, and recognizes the dire problems that are taking this show to the bottom of the sea.  If the execs don't key in to the fact that they depend on the fans, the ratings will continue to dive... dive... dive...

Pulling a Fronsie on CBS

I'm thinking back to my high school days and reading the weekly student magazine that came out of the journalism department.  Every week we'd sit around reading the editor's letter which was usually very witty and well written.  THAT was high school, and the dialogue found inside that magazine was infinitely more interesting than the daily fare doled out on Y&R for some time now.

Anyone who has checked any forum online within the last year knows that most fans spend time rooting for their favorite characters and talking about the storylines they like.  And then there is the back and forth of who's the best on the show.  But these days, most fans seem to be of one mind.  The super majority of fans daily shake their heads and wonder where it all went wrong.  Plots are promised and hyped by the network.  Stories begin and suddenly end without a climax or dénouement (thank you high school literature classes).  Characters are written against type in ways that only confuse history and future growth of that character.  Humor is written in and receives a huge response, and then is only revisited very sparingly.  And the carousel of actors turns and abruptly stops, tossing off someone we have specifically been tuning in to see.  Sounds like a great show, huh?

What happened to the show we loved to watch?  Be it long time fans, or new viewers who tuned in within the past few years, love for the show has turned to disbelief, which turned to anger, which turned to apathy, and that makes one stop watching altogether.  Thanks CBS and Sony, for your great leadership in bringing down yet another dearly loved soap.  We now have a term for that.  It's called a Fronsie. 

But if you maintain that Maria Bell is the best you can do and your hands are tied... (yeah, right) then at least give us back the actors who make the show not so putrid.  Let's begin with Tristan Rogers, whose brilliance shines through the dimness of the script.  Colin and Jill made us find a smile.  Odd feeling that was, finding joy in the show after such a drought.  But even when their scenes were far and few between, they left so many of us with that happy feeling from oh so long ago.  I even stop banging my head against the wall for those moments- a nice relief at that.

So either fix this thing, or go with a full Fronsal attack and put us out of our misery.  I plead for the former... in oh so many ways.